In this weeks article I had to cover relational unfoldment. This had to be my most challenging one, because I had so much I want to write and say to everyone. It was challenging also because I had to stick to one story line. Now everyone know when it comes to relational unfoldment I could write a whole book with multiple story lines. However I hope you enjoy this piece and most importantly I hope you receive some insight into your own relational unfoldment.
Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss was that book that changed my life forever. By the time I read this book I understood that reading and accepting wasn’t so much about true and false, as much as, it was about my internal compass and what resonated in my soul. I had intuitively learned to tap on the consciousness of authors, or what others would term the voice of the author to get what Shakira needed for her unfoldment in the moment. It was during this reading that I truly released, forgave and healed myself for the choices I made in my intimate relationships.
Dr. Weiss told the story of a rich man and a beggar who lived in upstate New York. He suggested that they had a soul contracts that they both would return to the earth field and play as reminders during each other’s life journey. The rich man worked on Wall Street and every evening as he came down the flight of stairs in his three piece suit; there was the beggar – dirty, smelly and hungry with his cap begging for money. Dr. Weiss gave an in depth account of the contracts we made with each other on a soul level to fulfill the purpose and plan for our lives on earth. He alluded that the beggar wasn’t concern so much about returning to earth as a beggar but he loved his soul brother so much that the agreement to return superseded everything else.
The story highlighted a love and bond that cannot be explained in words but certainly a feeling tone of kinship that we feel with others here. As I pondered on how great this love must be, that in spite of status, achievements, accolades and money each person along my journey could possibly be playing a part in my unfoldment I had to take another look at my relationships. Whether it was the dynamics of family, friends, co-workers, acquaintances on the street, the heartbreakers – relationship for me had shifted once and for all. I became more curious with what my contract with others could possibly mean. This expanded paradigm allowed me to look beyond the experiences I had labeled as unforgiving. I began asking empowering questions, one of which is “what are you hear to show or teach me” and this gave new meaning to my life.
What I knew was when I looked in my personal life I had more than enough relationship issues. The failed relationships I felt had left me scared and unworthy of intimate bonds. I had spent years trying to fit square pegs into circle pegs. In the valley moments I lost sight of “me”. The labels I placed on myself and my counterparts affected my choices and interactions with others. It outright affected the vision I held for my life. I had resentment and anger for the heart-breakers who I thought did me wrong. But alas, I pondered could it be possible that they loved me so much that they could show up in this- my life’s journey – in such a way? Could my mind comprehend this soul contract from someone that left me out in the cold?
It was in this pondering that my relationship with myself went deeper. I strived to clean up my agreement with myself and others. My heart and mind began to shift as I reacted to others from a space of gratitude more than disdain. My heart was simply saying “thank you” in every encounter. I was moved to compassion and gentleness for myself. The heart-breakers became my best friends, in fact my greatest teachers and the anger and resentment shape shifted to unconditional love. I was now ready for spiritual partnership.
Taking responsibility for our part in the soul contracts is the first step towards change and if by a slight chance I had made some soul contracts, to learn something then taking responsibility for signing the dotted line was mine to own. The second step is to look at your relationship with self. So often, we are bent on finding that “special relationship” without first cleansing and adjusting ourselves.
I implore you to look at your relationships as a spiritual practice, one that is giving you the opportunity to participate in a field larger than you. You can do this through the use of empowering questions and reflections. Once you adopt this practice then carry it forward into your intimate relationships. Intimate relationships offer us many rich opportunities to face ourselves and shed limited beliefs, opinions and attitudes that prevent us from being more fully ourselves. Don’t pull away when relationship become difficult rather find the rewards of connecting more profoundly. Utilize the relationship vehicle as a method to communicate beyond the body and into the dance of cleaning up some soul contracts. You will be duly rewarded! Namaste