In this month’s newsletter I shared with you how our relationships are not outside of us but that they are inside us. This is the simple truth that we must recognize and accept. My true relationship is my relationship with myself – all others are simply a mirror of it~ Shakti Gawain. As I learn to love myself, I will automatically receive the love and appreciation from others that I desire. If I am committed to myself and the truth, I will attract others with equal commitment.
My willingness to be intimate with my own deep feelings creates the space for intimacy with others. Enjoying my own company allows me to be able to have fun with whomever I’m with. Feelings of aliveness and the power of the Universe flowing through you creates a life of passionate feelings and fulfillment that you share with whomever you interact with. We must learn to love ourselves more by taking care of ourselves!
Because many of us have never really learned how to take good care of ourselves, our relationships have been on trying to get someone else to take care of us. Be it a lover, wife, husband, government, etc. What does it mean to take care of myself you may ask? For me it means not allowing others to do for you what you will not do for yourself. In other words, don’t allow others to treat you better than you treat yourself. For example I had a client who would not take her dream trip to Paris because she is waiting for Mr. Right to come along to take her…. Buy yourself flowers, candy, perfume – whatever your heart desires. Take yourself to dinner at a 5 star restaurant, dress up for yourself, give yourself the best treatment.
Secondly, taking care of yourself means trusting and following your intuition. It means taking time to listen to all your feelings even the feelings of hurt and fear and responding with caring, love and appropriate action. It means putting your inner needs first and trusting that as you do this everyone else needs will get taken care of and everything that needs to be done will get handled.
For example if I’ve been working too hard, I’m learning to put the work aside no matter how important it seems and take some time to play or just take a long hot shower or read a novel. The point I want to make it taking care of yourself is vital to you having a healthy relationship with yourself which will then be reflected in you having healthy relationships with others.